


Supersonic Love!!

by aglowSycophant



Category: Splatoon
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, F/M, Parody, agent 3 is an ageless being (16), agent 4 is 14, agent 8 is also 16 I Fucking Guess, man this is a trainwreck huh, marie 3 and 4 are siblings, this isnt serious i swear. please, unsure if continuing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-26
Updated: 2019-05-26
Packaged: 2020-03-19 20:47:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18978070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aglowSycophant/pseuds/aglowSycophant
Summary: anonymous asked:the fact that there's even a 4/sonic tag in the first place raises questions. BUT that being said, it would be hilarious to see even one story in it just for shits and giggles.so. here we are.





	Supersonic Love!!

Agent 4 was nervous for a few reasons.

1\. She was going into high school!! But… Not any high school… She was going into INKOPOLIS SONIC THE HEDGEHOG MARIO ODYSSEY HIGH SCHOOL!!! It was the most prestigious school ever. It was so prestigious that it made Boku no Hero Academia High School close down!!!!!!! Then all of the Boku no Hero Academia High School Yuuei School students transferred into INKOPOLIS SONIC THE HEDGEHOG MARIO ODYSSEY HIGH SCHOOL so the school was now EVEN MORE PRESTIGIOUS!!!

2\. She had classes with the popular kids..!!! She knew she had classes with the popular kids because Marie told her, and Marie is psychic. She said “Your class will have a jock or five in them, loser,” and then she took a bite out of a head of lettuce. Four cried herself to sleep. Her older sister was so mean!!!!

3\. One of the jocks was someone she had a MASSIVE CRUSH on!!! And her friend Bakugou Katsuki teased her about it all the time!!! But he was also stupid and dumb because he had a crush on Four’s other sibling Agent 3. And Three was a prep. But he kept trying to romance her!! Only… Three was gay, and she kept telling him that, and he didn’t stop, and it was just so BAKA!!!

Four looked into the mirror. She sighed. Her boring, ocean-blue eyes and glisteningly dull rainbow tentacles wouldn’t make Sonic like her at all! She was just so ugly, and she didn’t understand why she had so many suitors lined up at her door!! And because she had every boy in a 1000 mile radius wanting to date her, all the girls were jealous!!! They HATED her and BULLIED her in a way that is ABSOLUTELY NOT REALISTIC AND QUITE OBVIOUSLY STOLEN FROM A DISNEY MOVIE.

(Well, not all the girls, because some of them were gay, and Four was cool with that and all but she’s not  _like that,_ okay? Noah fenced!! XD)

She wore a black corset and fishnets and a cape and a sword and an eyepatch. Sighing to the tune of Welcome to the Black Parade, Four Naruto-ran out the door.

“Oh hi Four,” Bakugou said with an explosion, “Are you excited to be a high school?”

“No!!” she wailed. “I’m terrified!! It’s scary even though it’s pretty much just a more open middle school filled with basically the same people I’ve known my entire life!!”

Bakugou nodded sagely. “I understand perfect, Four. If anyone hurts you, I will kill them.” He punctuated this with another explosion. He didn’t look at it because he was cool. If Four wasn’t madly in love with Sonic, she would probably be madly in love with Bakugou, but Bakugou is madly in love with her gay sister, so maybe not.

“No!!!!!!!!!” she cried. “Don’t kill anyone!!!!!! That’s bad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Bakugou gasped. “It is???”

“YES!!!!!!!!!!!”

He started sobbing. Four didn’t know how to deal with emotion so she Naruto-ran a little faster.

But… She Naruto-ran into something hard like a wall!

“AAAAAH!!” she screamed as she fell over in a comical, over-the-top way. “I’m so sorry!!!!!!!”

“Woah there,” said the wall. Four gasped and blushed rainbow like her tentacles. “You gotta slow down!”

“S-S-S-S…. SONIC?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!” Oh no!!!!!!!!! This was SO EMBARRASSING!!!!!!!!!! “WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH, I’M SO SORRYYYYY!!!!!!”

“I know you have to go fast,” he said, standing up, “But you are going too fast!!”

Sonic held out a hand. Four grabbed it and he helped her up. She swooned at his [human fingernails](https://i.imgur.com/pgXjng0.png). “I’m so sorry!!!” she apologized.

“It’s cool!” he reassured. Then he struck a pose. “ONE!”

“Yeah… One…” She dusted dusty dirt off her MCR and FOB and also TOP pants. “S-So… How was your summer, Sonic?” she asked meekly.

“I spent it thinking!” he replied, walking next to her into school. “And there’s this girl that I like…”

“R-Really..?” Was it Four?!?!!?? No… It couldn’t be… It was probably–

“HIYA SONIC!!!” yelled Agent 8 from across the school. She scampered over. “WHY ARE YOU HANGING OUT WITH THAT SUPERFLUOUS NOBODY???”

“Oh… Hi, Eight,” Sonic said with a grimace. “Sorry,” he mumbled to Four. “I’ll talk to you later, okay?”

“… Okay..!” Four replied, watching Sonic walk away with that extra superfluous bitch. She then collapsed to the ground and cried rainbow tears.

Bakugou finally caught up to her. “What happened, Four??”

“Nothing…” she whispered and lied.

Everything had happened…

**Author's Note:**

> does....does anyone even want more of this?????
> 
> i had no idea sonic even had a canon age until now... hes apparently 15, according to the wiki


End file.
